Senior Moment Number 13,243

I have published this at Pops the Ole Man of the Net's Content Producer Page - Associated Content. Once I am paid or it starts collecting views I may copy it back to the blog.

Man Made Floods - Senior Moment # 99889

Most mornings I fill my coffee cup (or should I call it my tea cup) to make tea and put it in the microwave. I get the teabag ready then sort my dirty dishes and fill the sink with hot water, soap and the dishes.

If my timing is right I get my hot water hot and immerse the tea bag and bob it for a few seconds add the sugar or substitute and then turn the water off since the sink is half full.

This morning I went into the living room and turned in the computer and TV.

I took a couple of sips burning my mouth as usual (I do not know why I can not remember to shorten the heat time by 10 seconds but I never do) and felt like I had forgotten something.

I learned a long time ago to make a tour of the rooms looking for something out of place.

I always move from front to back which means the kitchen is last. I noticed I left the radio and fan on in the bathroom so I turned them off.

When I got to the kitchen the suds had reached the faucet – about six inches above the top of the sink. I turned the water off and moved the subs aside – I had come ¼ inch from flooding the sink cabinet and probably the floor and the room underneath.

That’s a first in all my years but makes me worry about other stupid things yet to come.

Senior Moment 324323 – The Shower

For most of my adult life (since I was 18 and we moved to this forsaken town and our first home shower) I have balanced myself while in the shower on one leg while lifting the other leg up and resting my toes on the bathtub edge to wash my leg and other parts – if you get my drift.

I always did the left side first then the right side.

I almost always had a ‘soft’ shower curtain on one side and sometimes I had a soft curtain that surrounded me. Once a long time ago, a friend’s shower had a glass sliding door for a shower door and I leaned on it while moving my foot/leg up.

The glass door was not fastened and it fell. Luckily nothing broke.

From them on I was always careful NOT to lean on things to get my foot/leg up.

Then I got thirty-day contact lenses – I loved them BUT - if I opened my eyes during a shower the contact would come out and be impossible to find.

I got very good at taking a shower with my eyes closed. I also got very good at balancing on one leg while I ‘found’ the top edge opposite the drain of the tub with the toes of the other leg. Sometimes I would be too close or too far away and would have to adjust my other foot and try again.

I have lived here for the last five years. I have a large claw foot tub – right next to the wall. I installed plumbing for a shower head and a metal frame for the show curtains to hang from. I am surrounded by shower curtains.

Even though I do not wear contacts anymore, I still shower with my eyes closed. I still balance myself on one leg/foot to lift my other to the end of the tub to wash ‘those’ parts.

Ever since my heart surgery, my balance is questionable. There is a reason but I forget what they call it.

It can take several tries before I feel steady enough to lift my foot. This morning I lifted my foot, got light headed and started to fall.

I hit the shower curtain and figured I’d need someone to help me fix things. I was hoping I didn’t break any bones when I fell.

I was bracing for the worse when I just stopped. Huh? I was leaning against the wall two inches outside the inside shower curtain.

I practiced leaning against the wall with my shoulder while I lifted my leg. You have no idea the freedom I felt. I practiced several times while laughing at myself.

I may just have to wash ‘those’ parts four or five times a day now.

Been Getting Busy - Warning Long Post

If you thought dirty thoughts when you read the title, shame on you.

Not really. But the title is sort of accurate.

Wednesday I woke up and could not find my sunglasses - they don't do any good except knock down the glare.

I decided I was missing many things, like my video camera and a pack of batteries for the digital camera.

I set things down to be put away later when I 'saw' them the next time. Can't do that anymore because I can't see them later.

Anyway it had been a while (yeah right - a year?) since I had thoroughly cleaned anything so I decided I could try - it's not like the kids run over every week to do it for me – did you ever? I must be a clean neat person. Stop laughing.

I decided the bathroom was the first stop. I am pretty sure the ring around the tub is gone and the shower curtains are different colors now but I bet it's all clean. Only took 1.5 cans of comet (is that right?).

Then I did the bedroom since it is pretty sparse except for all the pictures. Why do I hang family pictures in the bedroom? Beside the obvious I can't see them. I sleep in there with the lights out.

I'll bet the lights were not on in that room for a year before I lost my sight. Years ago I hung 'good posters' on the walls and even the ceiling - but they were definitely not family nor for family. I digress.

In the bedroom I found my sunglasses – must’ve worn them to bed. I also found a remote I lost months ago and talked the cable company into replacing.

Next the living room saving the kitchen for last since I figured it would be the hardest.

In the living room I found lots of cool things that at first I could not identify. I usually eat in front of the computer. I found a hard (at one time soft) roll that I thought I had eaten but instead knocked off.

I found lots of pieces of I am sure were popcorn and maybe M&Ms or raisins or something (mice?) – I didn’t want to vacuum until I checked the whole floor because who knows what I might have dropped.

I found a syringe, and a box of alcohol wipes I must knocked off and couldn’t find. I also found a bunch of square things I could not identify. Several just out of reach of my feet under the desk.

I also found a remote that I did not know I lost and cannot figure out what the hell it is for.

After I identified everything I could and put most things out of the way I vacuumed but within the first three feet I heard metal things bouncing their way into the bag.

I decide it would be best to use my shopvac so that I could more easily shift through whatever I sucked up.

I always wondered why they sold wide carpet nozzles for shopvacs – now I know – but I never bought one.

Do you have any idea how long it takes to vacuum a 10 by 20 room with a four inch nozzle? At least I had extensions and didn’t have to crawl around on my hands and knees.

(I remember buying those – there were two choices – a bag of extensions or a bag of extensions with a floor nozzle for $2 more – dummy me).

Luckily I remembered to empty the tank before I started and when I searched through the debris I found a bunch of little metal balls. I have no idea.

I left the kitchen for Thursday. I only have two things I could not identify. Small boxes about 3” wide and tall and an inch thick. I have about six of them. They were in a cabinet I very seldom use now.

I did find my favorite coffee cup and I am glad I could not ‘see’ what was at the bottom. I also found my video camera on the shelf above the trash can. How lucky am I that it didn’t get knocked into the trash.

I found three packages of batteries in the ‘big utensil” drawer and I found another pair of what must be sunglasses because the also block the light.

The only unusual things I found on the floor were popcorn and a mouse trap I had forgot about. Luckily it was empty.

My George Foreman grill was really greasy on the bottom so I sank it in a sink full of extremely hot water. Something told me this might not have been a good move but I washed it when the water cooled down and all surfaces feel ‘squeaky clean’.

I put it in the oven at somewhere between 100 and 200 degrees and left it for four hours (I forgot to set a timer and felt the heat when I walked by). I closed my eyes (pun intended) and plugged it in.

It got warm so I cooked a burger – it had a funny taste – might have been I didn’t get all the soap off or I ruined the finish.

I cleaned it with wet paper towels then put veggie oil on it to cure it. The 2nd burger tasted great.

Remember those keys I lost last summer? Found them – under the kitchen table near the wall. Remember that picture frame I dropped and the glass broke? Found it under some paper bags in the corner of the counter top.

Remember the lottery tickets I bought at Christmas but lost? Found them right where I put them so I would not forget. Can’t tell you if I’ve won anything.

But at least I got back one thing – a little pride. I can go shoeless around the place once again.

Senior Moment 32432

Another of those pesky senior moments. Yesterday morning I was visiting a blog of a young lady that went to Iraq for us and celebrates something called HNT. She is also a Steelers Fan so we are natural enemies (not really) and she works for or with the RedSkins (yea!!).

Any way I left her a comment on her blog about her machine and accessories. And tonight she left me a comment on this blog. I was surprised because I do not advertise this blog and I could not figure out how she would have found it.

Later, while I was pondering her astute detective skills I got a message from a friend that wondered how I could possibly talk about 'her' accessories when we did not know each other.

After several 'speakings' of the message I had the reader tell me who the message was directed to. Bright light finally came on.

You know I have several Email accounts that I have acquired while working for several companies and to help me keep the blogs I support separate. Well, I used my personl private account that only about six people know and posted a comment and sent an email.

Luckily the senior moment only lasted for those two mistakes.

If it were not for senior moments I might not have many laughs.

Eye Update

Some days I am blind as a bat. I can see nothing out of my left eye and only light maybe a little color out of my right.

Sometimes right after a shower I can see fairly good out of my right eye. Today was a good day for my right eye.

My son-in-law took me to the grocery store and I was able to see well enough to get most things. Only needed help with a couple of items that look alike but have one word that I need to make sure of.

My biggest obstacle is identifying cans. My daughter uses a black or Red marker and writes a letter on top of the can to identify it. C for chilli beans, p for pork and beans, D for diced tomatoes etc.

I was seeing so good I decided I didn’t need my son-in-law to mark cans for me but after he left I got so overheated carrying everything up the steps that I could not see what the cans contained.

So I just left them to the side hoping my eyesight improves. I buy canned fruit – lasts longer and I don’t have to cut it up plus they have started packing it without all the sugar.

I have been hungry for peaches so I opened a can I thought was peaches. I picked the biggest around can there was because the fruit is usually packed in the biggest can.

I didn’t get peaches. For supper I am having pork and beans – that’s what I had last night.

Oh well, I can always use the fiber.

Cold Fish

I like to bake salmon in aluminum foil for about a half hour then broil it for three or four minutes with a fresh coating of butter and lemon. I do this all in the toaster over.

Tonight I followed my normal routine. When the timer went off at thirty minutes I melted the butter in the microwave and got the lemon juice ready. I opened the oven to get the fish and it was empty. I looked around the counter thinking I had already taken it out but my brain disagreed.

When I had wrapped the fish and turned on the oven I had put the fish on TOP of the toaster oven instead of in it. I corrected and laughed at myself. The timer went off and I opened the package to season it. I turned the oven to broil and set the timer for five minutes.

When I got back into the living room something triggered my brain. I went back and sure enough I had put the tray back on top of the oven.

Another senior moment to share. The high point of my day.