The JFK Assassination

I was 11 in 1963 and had just finished crosswalk duty at Washington Grade School.

It was a cold rainy day and I could not wait to get home and sit in front of the register to warm up.

A lady that lived near the crosswalk told me I should hurry home, the President had been shot.

She had teased me on other occasions but I could not understand why she would tease about this.

I ran home and know I talked to Mom but I do not remember the conversation.

I do remember many hours in front of the TV watching the news and the funeral. I think we got 2 or 3 days off from school.

I remember the horse without the rider and the backwards boots. The cadence which I was forever reminded of whenever a marching band kept the beat for marching betweens songs.

The horse drawn hearse and the salute from his son. Jackie O veiled in black holding her children’s hands.

I remember watching a guy get shot on live TV. Ruby shooting Oswald I think.

I remember during the first few hours thinking it had to be a joke or a weird movie but the longer it went on, the more real it got and the sadder it got.

I know we spent a lot of time at school discussing everything – I guess they would call it grief counseling – we talked about it for a long time and nothing was off limits.

I do not remember the conspiracy talk until much later.

I remember watching the moon landing and I remembered JFK’s speech about reaching the moon by the end of the decade I think were his words.

I think that speech was the first presidential speech I had ever heard. I still remember the chills up and down my spine at some of his words.

I sometimes wonder what the world would have been like had whoever missed 45 years ago.

Would Vietnam have turned out different? Would we have landed on the moon? Would the supposed perpetrators have been caught and the conspiracy exposed?

Who would have been the next president if JFK had lived? What other goals were being considered by JFK beside the moon trip?

I remember when one of the reports came out, maybe the Warren report, that there was no way a group would conspire to kill a president – the position was too protected.

I was young and naïve. And was just starting to learn American History beyond the civil war.

Now after living through Vietnam, Watergate, Reagan, Clinton, 9-11, the space shuttle and station – the Internet and social networks, I find that nothing surprises me and that the people of the world are capable of anything. Anything.

I wonder if the world made a big wrong turn the day JFK died or did it make any difference at all.

I doubt I will ever know.

Stupid Neighbors

I stayed in bed for almost 24 hours yesterday to today except for bathroom and drink breaks. I also got up for a 2 hour email, twitter, and news check.

I fell so much better but I am still planning on living in bed today. I remembered why I was having so much trouble sleeping.

The downstairs neighbors have evidently installed a ceiling fan in the bedroom under mine. But the ceiling fan sounds like a dryer or an out of balance washing machine just starting to spin.

The nose is very irritating and is not cyclic – it does not repeat itself. It is different every revolution. I can not get use to it and filter it out.

If I have gone to sleep with it off, as soon as they turn it on it wakes me up.

If it is on, I cannot get to sleep, I try sleep on the couch but I am too use to my mattress.

I tried a fan to drown it out. I attempted playing a radio with different genres of music with no luck.

I put in ear plugs but the noisy intruder is anchored (maybe not correctly) right under my bed and the noise and vibration comes right through my bedding.

I cannot understand why the idiots do not hear it but they are of the mindset that just having a ceiling fan is a luxury never mind it makes lots of noise. They are clueless.

Or else they are doing it on purpose.

Whatever the circumstance, I complained to the landlord and while I have not got a response, he sometimes acts and waits for a few days to make sure the problem is solved before following up.

For the last 24 hours I have not heard the fan. Hopefully it is because they were told to shut it off or maybe it broke.

As long as I can get some sleep I do not care why.

Evidently that noisy fan was causing a much bigger problem the I thought.

Many times I just put up with stuff – this time I am glad I have opened my mouth.

Lingering Sickness

I can not seem to get rid of this virus. Inconsistent coughing, short lasting fevers with chills and sweats, stomach problems every other day. Tired all the time. Joints hurt groaning and creaking when I move them.

It really sucks. I can only make it an hour in front of the computer before my head screams for a pillow or couch arm.

Recliner is unusable – laying on my back causes my lungs to fill with crap making breathing so difficult and raises my blood pressure to stroke level.

I’ll be back as soon as I recover – if I ever do.

I wonder if this is what the process of dying is like. If it is, I wish it would hurry up.

Moving Slowly

I have been completely run down the last few days, maybe the last two weeks. I get up at 3 or 4 am and make it until 9 or 10 am then I am done.

I can barely make it to bed. If I have not eaten, too bad – I go to bed hungry. I’ll sleep two or three hours, not very good sleep but it is sleep and then I get to pee, get a drink and back to bed where I might toss and turn for fifteen minutes then back to a restless sleep.

Most days I forced myself up at 3 pm, took a shower and watched stupid TV or surfed the computer. The last two or three days I just let myself sleep and it has been 630 or 7 pm before I get my ass up.

Then I am starved so I eat whatever is easy and take a shower sometime before 10 or 11. I watched whatever crap I recorded that night and am back in bed around midnight or 1 am.

And the cycle starts all over. I just feel like crap – so whatever it is I hope it stops soon. This is boring as hell.

By the way, has anyone called him President “O’ yet – like ‘O’ for Oprah.

No malice intended – just thought it was an odd thought.

History was made – many blacks are still stunned about what happened.

In my opinion the everyday person finally decided to let their voice be heard. The egotistical, greedy, power hungry idiot politicians have screwed the normal person’s everyday life up.

It was time to start fixing things and they did.

Only time will tell if President ‘O’ can pull everything together and keep the idiots in check.

Nightmares

I have had the same nightmare for three nites running. I am driving down a road in the city and stop for a stop light in the turn lane. A man is walking across the street, looks at me then lunges through the passenger window asking for a cigarette.

I tell him no.

He lunges grabbing me around the neck and I return the gesture but I also step on the gas and start pounding his face with my other fist while driving with my knee.

A cop gets behind us with lights and sirens but the guy won't let go. So I squeeze his throat harder and poke at his eyes. He screams when I hit my target and lets go of me. But I hang on because do not want to let him get away.

I slam on the brakes and the cop pulls up on the passenger side and grabs the guy - he tells me to let go but I can't - my hand is frozen. The cop pulls harder and I know it appears to him I am trying to kill the guy. He tells me to let go or he will shoot. I yell NO, don't shoot but then the guy does.

I still have him by the throat but I look down and see a red stain spreading across my chest. I look up and I see an old friend turning blue then I hear another shot and he goes limp and I wake up in a cold sweat.

It seems so real.